Raising Girls

Annie our middle girl, turned 8 last Friday.  You should see her dance, almost scary to a dad to see how talented and graceful she is.  Lucy turned 5 in March...Wendy and I are still trying to figure out where she fits into things.  One thing is for sure, she's a social butterfly.  Must take after her mother. Emma turns double digits this coming August.  What a little woman she is becoming.  Her smile melts my heart, and often my wallet.

I've just sat down with a new book published years ago entitled "Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters."  And for all the dads out there who really care if there daughters grow up loving the  Lord and not themselves, it's worth your time.  Wendy and I have now had almost a decade of chances to be good parents, and good is about all the credit I can give us.  Maybe Wendy would give us more stars, but in reality we could have done better.  But let me stop right there and remember how much grace God gives us, even in raising girls.

So what does a strong father look like?  In the book, the author mentions ten secrets (common sense stuff really, but often forgotten) to becoming a strong father...

1.  You are the most important man in her life
2.  She needs a hero
3.  You are her first love
4.  Teach her humility
5.  Protect her, Defend her
6.  Pragmatism and Grit:  Two of Your Greatest Assets
7.  Be the man You want her to marry
8.  Teach her who God is
9.  Teach her to fight
10. Keep her connected

"Protecting her and teaching her about God, sex and humility doesn't require a degree in psychology.  It just means being a dad." Meg Meeker, M.D. and author of "S.F, S.D."

Being a Dad...it seems that I have failed many times through out the last 10 years.  But can I tell you all something kind of cool, God in his mercy is showing me where I need to step in and be more of a dad in my girls' lives.  More than two years ago, God revealed to me that I needed to step up and take more of a spiritual role with Wendy and I.  And for over two years now, Monday-Friday we sit and communicate about the day before and the day ahead, then bow our heads, hold hands and speak to our creator.  Men, this was hard for me to initiate. But I did it, reluctantly at first, then Wendy began to want to pray.  Now we take turns, though I will have to say when Wendy prays I feel like God really listens in a bit more!  How has this impacted us...you could say it is wrecking all we thought we knew, and were holding onto.  God knew we needed to grow together a whole lot more before embarking on a journey like Africa.  I should state, we never prayed to be missionaries...at least I didn't!

Though Meg Meeker never came out and said it, her book implies it on almost every page.  I The best way we can love our daughters is to love their mothers first.  I once heard a married woman say that even though her husband wasn't very loving to her, she knew that he loved the kids and that to her meant he was a good father.  That woman is now divorced and her kids are lost in the middle.

So what is a dad to do?  Recently, I have taken more time in prayer to ask God to lead me to be a better dad.  And as you have already read, been reaching out to see what Godly men and women are saying about raising girls in the Lord. Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters magically appeared on my bookshelf...thank you Wendy.  The two TVs that were installed in our daughters rooms are now gone.  Internet use is strictly limited and monitored heavily. We have initiated nightly bible reading together as a family followed by prayer, something I should have done years ago!  And in case you want to know what a 5,8, and 10 year old like to listen to from the bible...we are currently in Exodus and moving forward through the life of Moses. Kind of strange when you are reading about a HERO that killed a man for beating another.  But again, God is wiser than we are... And now I have this blog to keep my feet to the fire.